Friday, November 13, 2015

Sinus Fiction (#FlashFictionFriday*)

“You can always tell which ones are aliens,” he said, pointing to a woman across the street wiping her nose with a tissue.

I was alone on the bench, waiting for my bus, reading an Enquirer story about a spate of recent UFO sightings, when he sat down beside me and started talking. I did my best to ignore him.

“They never cover their mouths or noses when they sneeze,” he explained to no one in particular. “They’re releasing droplets containing microorganisms into the air for you,  I mean us, to breathe in. The effect is sort of like catching a cold or the flu, but more along the lines of possession.”

I tried burying my attention deeper in my newspaper hoping he’d take a hint and blow off.

“You see,” he continued, “each microorganism is an alien seed that grows inside you, I mean us, until, well, you know. Tendrils in the brain, mind control, and all that. It all happens in an instant.”

He snuffled noisily then pulled a white handkerchief from his hip pocket. It was allergy season so I didn’t really think about it.

“Here we go!” he blurted turning his wrenched face directly toward me and sneezing violently without covering his mouth or nose.

He then stared at me, grinning manically, carefully wiping his face with his handkerchief.

“My mom always called me ‘little snot,’” he said, laughing a crazed, alien cackle. The woman across the street was pointing at me and laughing as well.

I gasped as I realized what was happening, clamped my hands over my mouth and nose, but knew it was too late.

I felt suddenly slimy. Everything took on a green tinge. My mind felt blown.

“Oh booger,” I opined as their thoughts began probing mine, picking my brain clean.

* It’s flash fiction Friday! (To learn more about FFF, click here and scroll down.) 
Flash fiction is nothing more or less than a very, very short short story. This one is only 300 words and a bit silly. I think a little silliness is a good thing in any kind of fiction. What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!

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